


Beetlejuice the musical sandersides au

by Clmcd



Category: Beetlejuice - Fandom, Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-11-30
Updated: 2020-11-30
Packaged: 2021-03-10 04:07:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, Underage
Chapters: 3
Words: 1,669
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27787978
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Clmcd/pseuds/Clmcd
Summary: When logan and Patton die a family moves into there house. So they call on the help of remus the demon ghost to scare they family into leaving. But what will happen once Logan and Patton get close to the angsty teenager virgil?
Relationships: Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders/Deceit | Janus Sanders, Logic | Logan Sanders/Morality | Patton Sanders
Comments: 3
Kudos: 9





	1. Chapter 1

The prologue 

It was a rainy day on the funeral of remy deets as the pastor starts to talk Virgil looks up at the sky rain dripping onto his pale face . The pastor takes a deep breath and being begins s to talk"In times like these, we have no words  
We have only each other  
Today we come together to mourn the passing remy Deetz  
Devoted husband of Janis  
Beloved father to Virgil  
Scripture tells us  
"Sorrow not, for we do not walk alone." Everyone walks away but virgil stays and looks down his father's grave. He sighs and wipes away some tears "You're invisible when you’re sad  
Clocks tick and phones still ring. The world carries on like mad.But nobody sees a thing Whispering behind their hands Lost for kind words to say. Nobody understands And everyone goes away. Grownups wanna' fix things. When they can’t it only fills them with shame So they just look away  
Is it being greedy to need somebody to see me. And say my name? Seems when you lose your dad No one turns off the sun. Folks carry on, that’s that You’re invisible when you’re sad" Virgil takes one last look at his fathers grave and runs to his dads car.

Once Virgil is gone a weird looking person dressed in Disney villain looking outfit pops up. "Holy crap, changes to the lyrics already? And such a bold departure from the original musical hi im remus and i play beetlejuce but my name in this fic is still beetlejuce because the writer of this fic didn't know what rhymes with remus for the song say my name bye bye!" He says as he pops away


	2. The whole being dead thing

Once again remus pops up in the graveyard and smirks "Hey, folks! Begging your pardon! Scuse me! Sorry to barge in. But let's skip the tears and start on the whole  
Y'know Being dead thing.  
You're doomed! Enjoy the singing the sword of Damocles is swinging and if I hear your cell-phone ringing. I'll kill you myself. The whole being dead thing!. Death can get a person stressed: "We should have carpe'd way more diems now we're never gonna see 'em!.I can show you what comes next so don't be freaked. Stay in your seats  
I do this bullshit, like, eight times a week! So just relax, you'll be fine. Drink your fifty-dollar wine and take a breath!" Remus snaps his fingers as he possesses the people attending a funeral. "Welcome to a fanfiction about death!" They yell as remus magically has a Guitar "You're...you're gonna be fine...  
On the other side..." he suddenly smashes the guitar "  
DIE! YOU'RE ALL GONNA DIE! YOU'RE ALL GONNA DIE!" Then a microphone appers and he grabs it "I...I'll be your guide (Yeah) To the other side..." he jumps onto a casket thats being burried "Everybody gets on Vine here  
Like Rodgers, Hart, and Hammerstein here  
The women's bathroom has no line here  
Just...pee where you want!  
The whole being dead thing!  
You're just gonna love the folks here. Yes, I know you're woke, but you can take a joke here! and every show I do, like, a TON of coke here The whole-" He pretend sniffs  
"PAH! The whole being dead thing. Nobody is  
bullet-proof! "I work out, I eat clean!" Jesus, pass the Dramamine Time to face the brutal truth: 'Cause we're all on a hitlist Might not live 'till Christmas  
Choke to death on Triscuits  
Hey, that one's just statistics So take a little break here Nothing much at stake here. The scenery is fake here THERE'S A GIANT SNAKE HERE!" He yells as a huge snake grabs a random person and takes them away. Remus grabs the microphone again and starts to scat "You're...you're gonna be fine...  
THANK YOU! On the other side...  
HOW YOU DOIN'? Not good" he throws away the microphone and jumps off the gravestone " I'll...I'll be your guide!  
To the other side! Seriously, though, this is a fanfiction about-" he starts to control the funeral attendees once again " Death is taboo, but it's hardly something new There's nothing medical professionals could do 'Cept maybe just bill you!" Remus laughs slightly as the attendees sang remus once again breaks the 4th wall " if you die while reading this fic people will still be reading" he says with a shrug as the funeral attendees sing " There's no destiny or fate Just a terrifying wait filled with people that you hate And on a certain date the universe kills you!" They say as remus goes in front of them "That's the thing with life:No-one makes it out alive! Toss that body in the pit "Gosh, it's awful, ain't it tragic?"  
"Blah, blah, Bible. Jesus magic.When you're dead, who gives a shit? No pilates, no more yoga! Namaste, you frickin' posers From the cradle to cremation. Death just needs a little conversation! I have mastered the art Of tearing convention apart So, how about we all make a start On the whole being dead thing!" The funeral attendees leave as remus sits on someones grave stone " God, I hope you're ready for a story about death!" He says as he walked away from the graveyard and heads for a nice looking house on a hill where death will soon strike


	3. Ready set not yet

In the middle of Florida lived a married couple named patton and logan. Logan was fixing a baby crib while patton was making pottery. Logan smiles at the crib fixed " Look at this crib  
In all of its glorious antiquary. Every curve and surface speaks to me. Saying pamper and spoil me. Sand me and oil me Come on! I know to the untrained eye it’s boring,. But nothing’s a chore when you’re restoring  
Apart from frustration, pain, and financial drain It’s fun!" Logan stands up and wipes away the sweat from his head "Folks say logan Why do you polish your crib when you don’t have a kid? And even if you did have a kid,. This crib is too precious for placing a baby inside it. So it simply exists to remind you. Your sense of perfection is just a reflection that you are not mentally prepared to make room for a kid Logan, why don’t you live? Logan, just make a start. Are you willing to take the next step? Ready, set- Ready, set-" patton walks into the room holding clay jugs "look at these jugs! Amazingly glazed and terracotta-ery  
I took some clay and made you pottery. The world will never wreck you I'll protect you in a father's embrace Folks say, patton Why can’t you see that ceramics is simply a manifestation of motherly panic By making a baby that's breakable Aren't you creating a way of translating the terror of making maternal mistakes into clay Hiding away so you don't have to face being a bad dad  
Patton. That's what you've done, patton Just make a start Are you willing to take the next step Ready, set-" he sits walks over to logan and smiles more as they both sing. " Here we stand  
At the end of a 10-year plan  
A house A yard A minivan A baby should be next  
Together let's leap off the cliff .Fall forever, then smash to bits. Trapped in a terrifying viper pit. Of diapers and regret are we willing to take the next step? Ready, set- ready set- not yet why rush? Why rush?   
Soon enough, our hopes and our dreams will be crushed But not yet! Not now" the floorboards start to creak as patton and logan move around.  
"Ooohh?" Logan says as he steps on the floorboards "no! We can't start a family in a house with creaky floorboard" patton nods "You are absolutely right let's add it to the list. With the cracks in the plaster" loganwalks back over to patton "The wi-fi should be faster " he added patton nods "This sofa needs a castor" he says "The bathroom’s a disaster! " logan says "What about global poverty? Then there’s the whole darn economy The whole Middle East." "We should learn Mandarin" patton adds logan nods "or Spanish at least No habla español  
Dos cervezas por favor. And that’s all we got and that’s not a lot. Do we want a bilingual household or not?" They smile as remus pops up with fizzy juice and popcorn he sits on the couch and watches them. "So let’s go slow. No breaking a sweat  
What’s the point of having children. If we’re drowning in debt?" Patton steps onto the creaky floorboards "  
Now we’re totally" logan smiles and stands with him "  
Completely" patton smiles "  
Maybe eighty percent" patton says. At this point remus was dancing around them and still eating his popcorn and skating " Ready to take  
The next step (Yeah! Yeah! Yeah Yeah!) The next step (Zooby dooby dooby, dooby dop and bow!) The next step (Zweeby, beeby, boo-bah-bah-dee!) The next step" the floorboards break and both of them all trough the hole. "Ready, set let’s-GoooAaaa..." they died as soon as they hit the cold hard ground. Remus puts down his popcorn and fizzy juice and looks down with a show "see i told you this was a fic about death!" He smiles and then gasps "what is wrong with you readers they just died!" He looks at the bodys "oof" he steps away "now that they are dead...i can get them to say my name so a human can see me and then i can get the human to say my name. I'll be human again!!!" He cheers "now that book should be here ah! Here it comes" a book falls from above. Remus smiles "now this is the handbook for the recently defeated? No thats not it..deceased? I think thats right!" He contines talking to no one until he hears a groan "uh oh here they come" remus runs off as patton and logan crawl up from the hole....

**Author's Note:**

> Hi this is my first fic on here I hope you like it!!


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